Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
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terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize