I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
