giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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