Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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