maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
