Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
