Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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