mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank