"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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