Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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