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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
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