So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
honey bunches of taint.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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