The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
