Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
