I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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