rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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