she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize