East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
