She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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