What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
