i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
