im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You can't special order awesome
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
