that's an acceptable place to lick
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize