Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
