I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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