He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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