whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
It's never too late to be topless.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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