we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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