she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
