Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
