I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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