The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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