Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
