Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
