why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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