Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
