she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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