Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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