Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
