I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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