so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
