break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You need Xanax blowdarts
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
