But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
