Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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