Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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