pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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