If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
