I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
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I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
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I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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