Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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