we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
